Irreverence

This past Sunday was New Member Sunday at my awesome church. I, along with other new members, spoke to the entire congregation. This is what I said:

"God talks to me like a sassy, black woman.

This is a direct contradiction to verything I'd ever learned about God growing up.

My parents are conservative Bible literalists and everything I've ever learned about God, I could sum up in two sentences: God was a white, conservative male who voted a straight Republican ticket. He was also in charge of everything good or bad that ever happened to anyone.

When I was 3, I was molested by the pastor's son in the church basement.

So, I've been an atheist for as long as I can remember because I couldn't imagine a god existed who would want that to happen to me.

I don't really know how I got here, except that about 2 years ago, God started whispering to me and about a year ago, she started yelling because I was ignoring her.

She brought me here on Easter Sunday and I immediately found that everything I thought I knew about God was wrong because everything I thought I knew fit into a really tiny box. I feel the spirit of God living and breathing in these walls and radiating in all of you. It feels like coming home but I never even knew I was wandering."

Followed by some awkward mumbling and apologies that I cried in the middle.

Thank you, my sassy God, for meeting me where I'm at everyday.